Idaho

At least Hemingway would have had a great view to look at as he went about setting up his own demise. When I first started this I thought, how could someone kill themselves in such beautiful country. Yet, I remember now that the great expanse of the sky and the many ridges and mountains crowded together can seem empty and too full at the same time. I imagine those are two feelings many people experience before they do themselves in. On one hand, they feel nothing but a giant black void in their soul but on the other hand the amount of intense feelings before a person pulls the trigger or puts their head in a noose seems like it would be too filling. Too much happening for a life to want to hang around.
I myself drift from one silly extreme to the other with a latency period of boredom. For a month or two I will contemplate suicide almost daily because I am too full with feelings of disappointment. Then I will mellow only to follow it up with an intense period of happiness which is in some instances a very empty feeling.